I know I’m not the only person who has ever prayed or wished for green lights when I’m in a hurry somewhere. But it was a wonderful friend and mentor Elaine McGrath, who maaaaaaaaaany years ago at a mothers group I used to attend said the words “God sends the red lights too”.
It has to be 20 years since then but I have thought of it so very often (not just while sitting stopped at traffic lights – though it does help me recognise that stop lights work in sync with go lights and together with the amber lights – they create order on the roads) but also in life where I feel stuck or stopped by one thing or another.
God sends the stop lights too.
Often I’ve felt resentful or confused by the stop lights of life. They can feel like obstacles to be pushed past, but sometimes, no amount of effort sees the red change to green until the timer does its own thing. These are the times I can so often look back on and see, that if I’d ignored the stop light and gone through anyway – a great hulking semi would have hurtled down the road and flattened me (and therefore – US).
About 8-9 years ago I thought I knew the direction I was to go in. I had a vision and a plan and I put it to Rod, who gave me a gentle but firm stop light. And I was not a happy camper.
A related idea not long after, was to write a set of resources together with a friend who had a very similar frame of reference to me and saw the same possibilities. She and I got together each month to talk and plan and we began putting pen to paper. About the 5th month that we met to discuss, we both leaned back from the table and one or the other of us said “I’m not so sure God wants us to do this”, and the other one agreed. We decided to put it on hold and just wait a while and see if God changed what we felt to be a stop light, to a green light.
It never happened.
In fact, what happened was that within about 4 months both she and I were unexpectedly pregnant – her with their 6th and me with our 7th, babies. Both of us. Totally unexpected. And then life continued in such a manner as to confirm time and again that in both those examples of life red-lights to me, God was looking out for us… He already knew the way ahead and was slowing me down, giving me margin, to A) manage what was to come and B) give me more time to increase my learning and my perspective.
I do wish it didn’t take soooooo very long to see and be able to feel the gratitude, but I am so glad when He gives us the confirmation and knowledge He truly was watching over all of our times.
Rod once asked my Dad “what do you do when you dont seem to be making a difference in a difficult situation?” – and Dad answered, “you do all you can, and then you stop”.
It’s the stopping that is sometimes the hardest thing.
Sometimes the stop light is chosen for us and we don’t accept it terribly willingly.
Sometimes we sense the amber is changing to red and can stop ourselves before disaster or difficulty strike.
And when disaster strikes as it sometimes will, He is still always there to help and guide us through but going slow, even when we’ve been crumpled, is still hard.
So for the last few days I’ve been thinking on God Stops. And again am amazed at His care. And again am so grateful for the people He puts around us who sometimes hear Him better than we can when our desire is engaged in the opposite direction… and for the times when we actually get it right all by ourselves.